Parenting. It’s not for the faint of heart. But here we are, charged with the task of raising a child or children to the best of our abilities. Is our best enough? Could we be doing it better? More patiently? More organically? More actively? More intellectually? More religiously? According to various social media outlets (if I see one more lunchbox with cheese cut into the shapes of whatever season we’re in with a cutesy note on polkadot paper — I might have to sign off on all social media), the answer is yes, we could be doing better. But here is my thought: No. And now I’ll tell you why.
Remember those first few clumsy weeks with your child? Gazing into his or her perfect eyes, stroking the duckling-soft tufts of hair? I remember thinking, “If this is as good as it gets, I am ok with that.” The only things our new treasures needed in the beginning were so basic (and all-consuming): sleep, food, love. When exactly did that change?
I will be the first to admit. I fell hard into Melissa and Doug toys, Baby Einstein videos, and the baby massage books. I read Dr. Spock and T. Berry Brazelton. My Type-A personality, seasoned with a pinch of neurosis, led me to believe that I needed to tackle this parenting task as I would a thesis paper or powerpoint presentation. Prepared. Researched. Confident.
But parenting is a journey and not a destination. You never reach the end or cross the finish line. There is no report card for good parenting and it’s not a competition. No medals will be given, no place will be awarded. And this is where the Instagram, Pinterest, and Facebook posts come in. We love affirmation. We want to know that we are doing a good job. And without those report cards, which have influenced us since our own kindergarten days, we need something. Recognition. Admiration. Approval. Social media has its benefits, but few things can shake a parent’s confidence like someone who appears to be doing it better. With greater ease. And with better lunch boxes.
Each child is unique, requiring a certain type of nurturing, guidance, and interaction. Those of you with multiple children can attest to this — how many of you say child #1 is so different from child #2 Or #3, or #4? I believe we are matched to our children. We are what they need and they are what we need. And guess what? You’re doing a great job. No one knows your child like you do and no one knows what’s best remember the basic things your kids need: sleep, food, and love. And give them these things in your own way. And that’s more than enough.
Posted by Mrs. Wilson
